National Let It Go Day

‘It’s not my fault’

I’d like to take you on a little journey  – bear with me whilst I explain the background.

A couple of years ago I was asked by a company to lead a team over the Yorkshire 3 Peaks – 24 miles in 12 hours. So, of course this excited me. To teach leadership whilst walking up hill and down dale, brilliant!

I set about the preparation training schedule, weekend endurance walks, kit, energy food, booking the accommodation for the night before as well as the night of the walk and briefed everyone on the most incredible mindset they could have to support a ‘comfortable’ walk and successful challenge.

So picture the scene reader if you will. I am at the front, leading 14 company employees and directors and we are 20 minutes up the first mountain when one of the young ladies, Rosie (name changed to protect!) says “I can’t do it – I have asthma and I haven’t brought my inhaler, I didn’t think I would need it.”

We continued to support and encourage Rosie to get to the top and back down where she very firmly decided that that was enough for her and she would sit in the first checkpoint car for an estimated 9 hours.

The rest of the team completed the entire challenge with varying degrees of struggle, pain, endurance and of course much needed hilarity! At around 9pm we all, including Rosie, sat down for a well deserved hot meal at Hortons finest pub, and I hear an announcement from Rosie, “It’s not my fault I’m not fit.”

Reader you will be pleased to hear I refrained from yelling the obvious “Whose fault is it then?”

Rosie had declined to train, to stay over the night before, to eat breakfast with us and indeed take onboard the mindset advice. All of this is entirely her choice which resulted in her having a demotivating experience.

So really, whose fault was it? Was her outcome completely outside of her control?

Do you ever find yourself thinking your fitness is someone else’s responsibility or that it’s someone else’s job to make you happy, or you simply hear the words “it’s not my fault” leaving your lips?

In short it can feel so disempowering when we think someone else is responsible for our experience.

So let’s flip that mind set to “How can I improve this experience, right now?”

You have the power to change your experiences. It is so liberating when we let go of thinking it’s someone else’s job.

So could the words “It’s not my fault” be causing you the biggest headache? I’ve put together a worksheet that takes you through the process, and more importantly highlights the actions you can take to empower yourself and live a high performing life. Download it here >>> It’s not my fault exercise

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